Funeral costs: what things really cost and where to get help paying

Losing someone you love is hard enough. Then the bills start coming.

Funerals in the United States can cost anywhere from $2,000 to $12,000 or more. The national median for a funeral with burial is around $8,000 to $9,000. That is a lot of money for any family, especially when you are not expecting it.

You are not alone if you feel overwhelmed. Many families are in the same place. The good news is that you have real choices, even on a tight budget.

What goes into the cost

Funeral homes are required by federal law to give you a written price list. Always ask for one. Common costs include:

• Basic service fee (the funeral home's base charge): $2,000–$3,500
• Embalming (not always required by law): $500–$900
• Casket: $2,000–$10,000 or more
• Burial vault or grave liner: $1,000–$2,000
• Cemetery plot and opening the grave: $1,000–$4,000
• Death certificates (you usually need several copies): $10–$25 each
• Transportation of the body: $300–$700
• Memorial service and printed programs: varies

You do not have to buy everything the funeral home offers. Federal law, called the FTC Funeral Rule, says you can pick and choose only the services you want.

Lower-cost options that are completely dignified

Direct cremation is often the most affordable choice. It usually costs $700 to $2,500 and skips embalming and a traditional casket. You can still hold a memorial service later, at no extra charge from the funeral home.

Green or natural burial skips the vault and uses a simple shroud or biodegradable casket. It can cost less and is legal in many states.

You can also buy a casket from a third-party retailer, like Costco or an online store, and the funeral home must accept it by law. This can save you $1,000 or more.

If your loved one registered as a body donor, a medical school may handle costs at no charge to the family.

Programs that may help with costs

Social Security pays a one-time death benefit of $255 to a surviving spouse or eligible child. It is not a lot, but it is something. Apply at your local Social Security office right away.

Veterans may qualify for free burial at a national cemetery and other burial benefits through the Department of Veterans Affairs (VA). Call 1-800-827-1000 or visit va.gov.

FEMA may offer funeral assistance if your loved one died from a COVID-19-related cause. Check DisasterAssistance.gov for current programs.

Many state and county governments have indigent burial programs for families who cannot afford costs. Contact your local social services or county health department.

Nonprofit organizations like the Funeral Consumers Alliance (funerals.org) can connect you with low-cost resources in your area.

Some churches, community groups, and mutual aid networks help families cover costs. Do not be embarrassed to ask.

What about personal loans or payment plans?

Some funeral homes offer payment plans. Ask before you sign anything, and read every line carefully. Find out the interest rate and total amount you will pay.

Personal loans from banks or credit unions may be an option, but compare rates carefully. Payday loans and some 'funeral financing' companies charge very high interest and fees. These can trap you in debt at the worst possible time. Be careful.

Crowdfunding on sites like GoFundMe has helped many families raise money quickly. It costs nothing to try.

One step at a time

You do not have to decide everything at once. Ask the funeral home for the price list first. Then ask what is legally required in your state. Then look into assistance programs before you commit to anything.

It is okay to take a breath. It is okay to ask for a simpler service. Honoring someone you love does not have to mean going into serious debt.